A breach of bonds


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This is a follow-up to my previous post:Quit crying…

As a child, the only way you could get me to talk to my father figure(s) was by forcing me to.

It wasn’t valued enough by the father figure(s) to ever be corrected in my youth.

And as an adult, the precedent was set.

As a child I was quiet and shy. As an adult, not so much. But it took work.

But even today, I still have major anxiety approaching strangers without a specific reason or answering the phone for unexpected calls.

We all have our stuff. I’m no different.

I’m confident and comfortable being on live television or public speaking, but try to get me to approach someone for the sole intent of meeting them… that’s often my Kryptonite (still working on it).

In contrast, I don’t mind being approached. I enjoy it — unless you have no social grace. I’m an “introverted extrovert”. Some people will understand what that means immediately. Others don’t.

I share this (as a follow-up to my previous post “Quit crying…” post) because if you create an environment where your children fear you — or are uncomfortable showing their emotions — or simply uncomfortable having a conversation with you, you’re likely not doing it with either of your best interest in mind.

And by the time you realize it and say, “You know you can talk to me, right?” it might be too late.

Your actions speak louder than words. And while children may not always remember what you said, they will remember how you made them feel. (*hat tip to Maya Angelou).

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou

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